Fluent Thoughts

Preparing for my sister’s wedding party is bringing me to the edge of craziness. Last year when we were preparing for my brother’s wedding party and knowing how much my poor dad had to pay; I told my father wouldn’t it be better if you give him the money to buy him and his wife new cars and go for a two months honeymoon and he could invest the remaining amount for his future kids expenses.

And now when coming to my sister it’s getting crazy; though the groom will pay for major stuff, my father will still have to pay a huge amount to prepare my sister to be the best bride ever (Sure she will be).

Last night while my mom and sister were writing the list of invitations, I was doing my puzzle and listening to the names that they will invite. God those are too many people to invite, too many people that will be with us in the same hall, too many people that will enjoy their time dancing, gossiping and eating, and my poor sister will be sitting there watching ugly faces with loads of makeup, people who will be talking about her most of the time, about if they liked her dress or not, about the wedding party if it was good or not, about if she was beautiful or not (She is no matter if they admit it or not), she will be nervous waiting for her groom to take her out of that hell.

After getting all of these thoughts in my mind I told my mom: “A honeymoon and a small reception party when I am back; only my close friends and those who I like from your friends and relatives will be invited” my mom didn’t reply, so I continued talking: “If I will not enjoy my own wedding party then no one should; it’s mine and I am the one who should enjoy it”

My mom wasn’t glad about what I said, and she said: “It is about traditions and life style; people in our community celebrate their wedding parties like this and we can’t be different or less” “By that it’s the guests who are celebrating the wedding not the bride and groom; it makes no sense to me if I don’t enjoy my own party” I replied. Then my sister starts talking: “I agree that I will not enjoy my wedding as I should, yet I might regret it if I didn’t do a wedding party and I will feel happy when watching it recorded later”.

“I can’t see any sense in that; it’s something I don’t get when paying huge amounts of money to please other people and show them that I could do better parties than they did and get some records of me in that party that supposed to be mine; smiling and pretending to be happy about it and welcoming the guests though I don’t know most of them and don’t like others and some don’t like me and are gossiping about me, my sister and my mother; others are comparing between me and my groom as if it is a beauty contest and discussing the matter if we deserve each other or not. Going in a honeymoon together and then celebrating our happiness with people we love is much better than an expensive party, that money could be spent on better things; things that will return with benefits on me”. No response from them so I continue doing my puzzle.

A burning skewer finding its way in my body; and settles in my spine. Choosing its favorite organ and spinning through it. Waking me from my deep sleep with pain shocks so fast that I could not ignore; it’s growing and spreading; it’s shrinking to settle again. Nightmares and strange dreams; sleeping and getting shocked; waking up and twisting. Getting up trying to reach the pain killer; it’s away so far away. Pain reduces; I go back to sleep and dream that I had my pain killer. Another shock but not as the ones before; a shock that made me sit and curve like a shrimp not knowing where the pain is, not knowing the source of it. I try to reach my mobile but can’t spread my arm enough to reach it. Suddenly it’s morning and I wonder if that was a dream, as soon as I try to get up, the pain shocks me again, I reach my pain killer and have two pills of it; wait in my bed curving like a shrimp until its gone.

Nothing, until now. I wonder what that was. It’s not the strongest pain I’ve had yet the strangest.

I was searching for my umbrella, could not find it any where.

WHO TOOK MY UMBRELLA ?

Why do you want it? It’s not raining outside.