Fluent Thoughts

It’s usually 10 years old a young girl would wish to reach; but I never thought of ten as a good age or enough years. “I want to be 27″ I would say blocking on the word seven “Twenty S……Seven”.

Why is it 27? And what did I think I would accomplish if I reached such age; I’m not sure. “27 is very old; you will be an adult then” Hajar would say “So?” “You will be a very old women” “No I will be a beautiful lady” very sure of my reply.

This July I will turn 27

 P.S. Photo taken by Ra-1

Baby boy

Last week my baby sister delivered a baby boy. I got so attached to him even more than my niece Shooka. I know that I like girls more and I can’t handle boys but this boy is so different ياكل القلب فديته

The other thing is that my baby sister is a mother and I’m not; do I feel jealous? Yes I do, still I’m happy for her. I get this weird feeling in my chest when seeing her feeding him; I don’t know how to describe it.

Trust worthy

 It’s strange how I managed to develop a strong friendship on line and how it seems that we know each other for ages; we share something that no other can share with us; the feelings, the struggle, the anger; all the same and for the same reason.

A different person

During the couple (nearly three) of years of blogging I have changed; I think developed would be a better word; to a better or worse person I’m not sure but I do feel much better for sure.

Fajir prayer

 ما يأخرها إلا المقرود

 و يا كثركم يا المقاريد 

Friend ship

الدنيا ما تسوى من غيرج

It was very early in the morning when she decided that she will be just her, from now on it’s only her but a part of her will pretend to be a part of them. She became her that pretended to be part of them until she became an adult who forgot that it was all pretending. She woke up one night by the sound of just her crying, she didn’t recognize just her and thought it was some one she didn’t know

“who are you?”
“I’m just you”
“I thought you were a dream I had once, or twice”
“I wish I was”
“I’m not what I’m pretending, am I?”
“No; you are just you”

It’s when she started crying with no tears.

I need something that I don’t want.

According to the big space of the unawake part of my mind there was more to see than what I have seen; it wasn’t just a dream and wasn’t something that I forgot for a period of time, it was there yet in denial.

Should I ask what happened after or should I simply forget it ? Oops I mean deny it.

…….

A lovely thought
Flowers always bloom and eventually they will fade.

A Lovely event
A friend’s birthday; when the clown makes fun of your stammer.

A Lovely word
Relax and take a deep breath before you talk.

A lovely day
A gloomy day

…….

I trusted it
Although it was always
Shameful, harsh and disappointing

…….

في فينات هذا الزمان أخذت بغدره
فحكى الدهر في صفحاته ألم طفلة
فتح الكتاب و تقلبت صفحاته و أنمحى ما قد يكون في زمانها
ليكتب غير زمانها زمان

…….

Get sense
Do sense
Talk sense
Or die soon
…….

Have a splendid weekend all